It occured to me today. I am not hypo... I am not depressed. I am just me. It's been so long that I have just been me, and maybe I can thank the meds for that. But I know better, they surely have helped, dramatically, but they are not the reason that I have had a good couple of weeks. No.... they just made it possible for me to improve.... and continue to improve.

So I have a secret.... and now I share it with you!

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I am powerless against my emotions... lol... big surprise there!
I am also powerless against my moods... another big surprise! haha

BUT, I found a way to control them! And i really don't care if anyone else agrees, cuz this my personal way. the way that I have found works for me. It's my personal truth, and i share it with you!

There is one thing I do have control over, and it's the key for me.

I can influence my thinking. I can't control it, and I don't want to. It's a powerful force. So I have become like a salesman, influencing it and swaying it to where I need it to be.

BOOM!

it turns out that my thinking directly affected my emotions which in turn would trigger my moods. I know that this has been explained to me before, but I am stubborn and I only learn the hard way.

This is my secret, lol. Influencing my thinking puts a powerful process in motion and I don't have to be in control of it for it to work!

I only started with telling myself it was okay. swaying my thinking to logically accept that everything was okay. that I was okay. that OUTSIDE OF MYSELF everything was fine. And the more I started to believe that, the better my emotions became about it, and it became easier to convince myself of other things too. There was always a part of me that knew it was B.S. but I ignored that part of me.

I ignored it and allowed myself to believe what I was telling myself. and the more I let myself believe, thinking and knowing it was all B.S. at times, the better my emotions became! now I am full of beliefs, and I protect those beliefs at all costs, because it is these beliefs that are keeping my emotions from becoming like an uncontrollable tornado!

Believing these things, like believing that I am okay. that I am worth it. I believe now that I am a powerful force in life and that I can handle what others throw at me! I believe that everyone feels the same way but that they hide it and cover it up.

I have a lot of beliefs now. And that part of me that thinks it's all B.S.? Well, I have turned my anger against that part of me and I keep it in check! It works! I get so angry at that part of me that it doesn't stand a chance. I have a lot of anger lol.

My emotions are pretty much 100% in check right now! My moods are not being triggered by them anymore either! I feel so healthy mentally, and without being hypo either!

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So I have shared my most important secret with you! I hope that you can find something in it. I hope that maybe..........just maybe...........