I made it out alive. I FINALLY slept yay. I slept like 13hrs,l I needed to though. It had been awhile

Have any of you been in a mixed state? It's horrible it seems I don't get the good manias anymore. I get the mixed state crap
The pdoc explained it to me. Bc I have went into a psychosis my brain is vulnerable to going into another one (psychosis). I went through that when I was first diagnosed, 2 yrs ago. That was scary as hell. I'm stubborn and didn't want to be bipolar even though several doc's throughout the yrs thought I was. Until the psychosis then I was like s··T maybe I am.

Mixed state:agitated, crying spells, intense anger, paranoia, racing thoughts, si,
Guilt etc it is awful. Depression/ mania occurring at the same time. After I found all that info my past pdoc (the one losing his license) I lost it. Now I need to STAY what I'm on at least for a yr. That what I'm telling myself for my son a yr he deserves it.

Thx to everyone. It really helps.