Hard for me(s) too, been in therapy for DID 2 years this month, very hard to show emotions, usually end up agitated, really dont understand how to stay in the moment endure the feelings, without dissociating, IRL will do the same, dont want anyone to see me upset, so will hide, or start to self injure, alters automatically will start in commenting, and interacting...

yet the most cathargic session I had with T involved him interacting with a child alter who was so despondent and crying, and I was like in a floaty place watching the interaction between them, suddenly I was there with them in that place she was, behind a gas meter where she had been trapped so many years, and a covergence occured and I wept like the wells of heaven were being dumped into my heart, I actually allowed myself to feel her pain, our pain, and yet this time their was someone there for us that didnt hurt us, but was supportive and caring, I learned allot during that session about why she had been trapped there bits of memory came back surrounding the event..it shocked the heck out of me, and my T, the intensity of the pain and reaction..but that the alter does not cry anymore, before I would always hear her weeping inside... now she is in a meadow picking flowers..not in a dark alley listening to the sound of the gas meter clicking..

The traumatic loop was closed that she was caught in..not sure but that is personally the closest thing to integration for us.

Emotions have a huge amount of energy, and I truly believe power allot of the switching for us and our alters..a.k.a memory peices..

Take care..be patient..it akes allot of time when you have been hurt so bad, and yet deined the ability to feel...

Eva