you said " I couldnt hear him and I stared back at him waiting for him to get out of the car but he turned around and drove away. I just didnt see him, he came out of nowhere. Im letting it make me feel like he's right, I suck, Im stupid, I dont deserve to be alive."

That maybe true thats how he made you feel. BUT it is not true. You do not suck, you are worth it. Everyone is.
Its too bad ppl get so upset driving. We all make mistakes. Im glad you didnt get out of your car.
Im very happy you feel safe. Music is a wonderful thing