Well, I have bipolar disorder, so I know what it's like to be depressed sometimes. The main reaction I have to your post is, "Why be depressed and miserable when you can get help and enjoy life?"

Feel free to read and post in this forum, but also to read and post in other places. Almost everyone of us here is getting help for our depression. It's amazing when we can get through it and see life in a whole better way. At 19 you have your whole life ahead of you. Do you think your parents would be opposed to your getting help?

Of course, it's your choice.

Ask as many questions as you'd like. That's a lot of what Psych Central is about!