My first husband treated me like an object. I didn't mind having sex on a regular basis, or even being a little "playful." But he was abusive; it excited him to beat the **** out of me and then force me to have sex with him. I wasn't allowed to enjoy sex at all; if I started to act like I enjoyed it, he would get really mad--but he wanted it all the time. He liked doing things that he knew physically hurt me, but then he wondered why I stopped wanting to have sex! It got to the point where I couldn't stand him even touching me; I felt like I wanted to vomit every time he touched me. He had no love for me at all. just wanted me as a sex toy.