I keep going because I have tried the alternative and failed. Going through the darkest of the dark I can now say that I am here for a reason, however small that may seem to be. Most days right now, it is to take care of my dog. On the better days it is to avoid the physical and emotional pain I have been through. On the best days it is just to never give up. I am not in a "good" place according to the world's standards, but I have shed that mirage and realize now that I am in A place...I am in the Lord's hands. And as black as the days are right now, that is a good place to be.