((tinyrabbit))),

Yes, that is what PTSD presents, it is like someone took your life and entire past and dumped it in front of you on the floor in pieces. It is very unsettling and confusing and yes, there is a desire to make lists and even be forgetful and disconnected.

So far everything you are saying is what takes place when challenged with PTSD. It is very confusing. It is going to take you time to sort through this confusion. And you are going to have confusing emotions too. You have to be "very patient" with yourself and while you will have confusing thoughts, don't feed into it, just observe and work on whatever you need to with the therapist.

Yes, you are going to need to talk about many things that challenged you in your past. You need to be validated for everything you struggle with emotionally as well.
You can also come here if you need to write things out too. We are always here to listen and support you, so don't be alone ok? You are going to get through this challenge. I will say that it will be one day at a time too. No matter what you feel, always be "kind and patient with yourself" you will get past this part.

(((Hugs)))