Wouldnt it be nice to turn back time? I know your ex had a bad effect on you, the same as many choices Ive made in life had bad effects on me. Even with the best intentions and hearts of hope we made mistakes in judgment. There are some things we just cant know til we've done them and then we pay the price. I wish it wasnt that way.

In honesty, I would love to be popular and have lots of loving friends around and joy in my life from those friendships. I had that before depression hit. Even in this thread it hurts that just 4 people felt like replying. Dont get me wrong, Im grateful for all four of you. I just wonder what those who didnt reply but read must be thinking of me. I must seem awful to them.

Worrying about it only brings me down. All I can do, and I know you'd agree, is hold my head up and try to be the best I can be.