Why this time of year? Perhaps you have S.A.D. -- Seasonal Affective Disorder, along with severe depression. You might want to look into it, and talk with your doctor.

S.A.D. is a real illness and when you combine it with depression you can really feel pretty awful. S.A.D. -- you probably know about it, but it's when you're severely effected by changes in the seasons; the darkness of winter throws you in to a depression. You don't begin to feel better until Spring. Summer is your best time and Fall begins the drop again into depression. Most people have a special lamp they use to sit under for a few minutes each day that helps.

And I assume you're still young - don't feel guilty for not having chose any special field or area to go into. Many people don't make that decision until they're in their mid 30's!!! Give yourself a break and don't obsess. In time, you'll find something.

God bless and please take care! Hugs, Lee