It doesn't sound to me that either of you should be in this relationship. But, since you only control you, I would leave if I were you, fall back and regroup and see if you can get your head on straight relative to other people and your wanting to be in control, etc. No relationship can work if either person is not being themselves and working on their own things, being responsible for themselves alone, etc.
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"Never give a sword to a man who can't dance." ~Confucius
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