The problem, stratocaster, is that I have difficulty getting out of bed. I have no motivation, zero, zip. I know I should plan better for the weekend because I know what's coming. But I'm a crappy planner and even poorer at carrying them out because of the motivation problem. I should somehow find it within myself to MAKE myself do those things, I know.

I like your idea to find some soothing sounds or music to fall asleep by. Something that would work to distract my mind from going to bad places. I found a couple of Trazodone in my medicine cabinet and took one at 6 this morning, but it still took me a couple of hours to finally fall asleep. I kept trying to think of nice places I've been, but then the memories turn sour.

So today, not better. I don't even exactly know how to describe how I feel today. Just hanging on to the fact that tomorrow it's back to work, back to the very insignificant purpose I have in life. It's just less painful because it's a distraction. Somehow, I just have to get through the next few hours, and then I have an Ambien waiting for me, so no repeat of last night.