I don't think your friend lacked compassion, it's just he has feelings too. I'm sorry you feel this way but I do think there is a lot of distorted thinking going on here.

People aren't all just invited out. Someone has to do the inviting. And if I was your friend and you just waited for me to invite you places, I probably wouldn't think you wanted to see me. I think you have to treat others as you want to be treated: with kindness, with respect for their boundaries, with understanding of their feelings as well as yours. When does J get to feel hurt?

It's okay to want your friends to comfort you. But they just can't be put through this kind of rupture and trust repair. It's not fair on anyone including you.

I'm not being mean to you. Just trying to show where the boundaries might be. I've been in this place and the answer is you just have to engage with people and not test them like this.

(((Hugs))))