Hi Rainbow,
I really don't know much about complex PTSD either, though I've heard the term in relation to a friend working with a client she thought had CPTSD and really ended up having DID.
I also don't think you have enough traits to fit the BPDdiagnosis, and I've said that before. And I don't know much about your past so can't comment on the trauma thing. I agree with SD who said someone can likely have this disorder without having gone through the stuff on that list, as I don't think diagnosis are that rigid, and someone can have features of a diagnosis without having the whole thing like you said with your BPD traits.
I agree too with others who say that it's more important to focus on the behaviors you're trying to change than the diagnosis which I know you're doing wonderfully on! I'm sure DBT T was just trying to be helpful, and maybe does have to do it the diagnosis for insurance purposes. (And yes, I know ts can diagnose because we learned about it in abnormal psych).
Emptyspace, I didn't see anyone writing anything about wishing they were abused.