I got a psychiatrist and am on SNRIs and some sleeping pills but nothing seems to be working. I've talked to some friends about stuff but I guess I come off too strong and they get freaked out. I guess I need to vent the thoughts but I need to do it in a way that's not with people that I care about. Otherwise they get pushed away. I feel like I need to protect them from myself. I guess I need to protect myself from myself too but I don;t know how to do that.

Actually Sam, I wouldn't say that I have faith. A couple years ago, I would've identified myself as an atheist and now I would say I'm more agnostic. I went to church for the first time on Sunday, hoping for some divine intervention. It didn't come but the people were really nice so I will go back.

I don't know how this stuff works or changes but it is overwhelming. It seems like the drugs don't work and I never sleep. Nothing changes and if this is what life is then I don't know why anyone goes through with it.

Thanks for listening though. I appreciate that there is a place where I can spew my thoughts without people getting scared off (I see given the other threads that a lot of us think the same way).