Thank you all so much. I just need to say too that I'm embarrassed by the way I got upset and said I wasn't returning to therapy-because I got really dramatic I said I had lost hope in God and people-I know and T knows (and my family because I've always been this way) that this is an issue-but this is the worst case and timing for this to come out. I hate that I'm this way...I think I need done additional help with emotions-maybe some DBT or something...