I have experienced that sometimes it is not about the words either one of us have used, but about the impression or the meaning of those words. Once my T finished a session by telling me that I was "taking big risks." I can't remember what topics that session I was discussing, but I certainly hadn't made any big changes in my life or relationships or work or parenting. I wasn't engaging in risky behavior like . . . well, we all know what that can entail, and that has never been cautious me. Next session, I asked him what he meant by that, and he didn't remember saying it. But he did say that what he was trying to communicate was that I was opening up in therapy itself, letting him see more of myself, engaging in deeper introspection. Not at all what I connected with his words.

I also find that he remembers what I say much better than I remember it.