I sort of see caring like I am with students in conferences or appointments. I care about my students in a sort of detached way. When they are in my office, they are my focus for the amount of time they are there. I do not answer the phone, or check texts or whatever - for that period of time - they are my focus and I do care that they are okay, getting enough sleep, can learn the material, are having a useful experience, I want them to do well and succeed and have decent lives and so forth. Some I do like better than others, but they all get my focus and attention individually. And then the student leaves and I go on to the next student or task. I have boundaries and do not become friends with them. I do not go to their weddings, or baby showers or golf tournaments. I care, but not like I do about my lover, my dad, my friends and so forth. They come and go, as it should be. I am more unique to them than they are to me - like I think therapists are with clients. It does not mean not care, just it is not the care of friends, family and lovers.