I found out I had BPD when I read about it in the DSM (Diagnostical Statistics Manual) in my pdoc's office, back in 2001. It might also be online.
Abandonment issues and identity issues, along with impulsivity were what clinched my diagnosis. As well as having 4 or more traits in that DSM.
it's healthy to ask questions. I am glad you brought this up. If you are not BPD, there are other forums on this site that might give you the support you deserve.
Carol