So I haven't SI'd in 21 days. Last night, I was carrying a knife from the dining room to the kitchen to put in the sink, and for some reason, I had it palmed, you know, so the blade part is up against the skin of your forearm?
It felt SO good. With a great feat of willpower and strength I didn't do anything, but why would I derive such great pleasure from feeling that? I mean, I was walking thinking, I could just press down and do this while people are in the room and no one would notice. But I didn't. So YAY. But I still feel guilty for thinking these thoughts, I guess that's why I am just getting it out in hopes it stays out.

I hope I didn't make anyone mad with this post.