((Switch)),

You say that you have alot of different disorders, but you also say "possible PTSD too". Have you ever been treated for PTSD?

I have gone through stages where I have really struggled like this myself. So I know the feeling of not wanting to do anything and just isolating, and yet wanting to talk too. When was the last time you had therapy?

When you get bad like this you need to reach out more, even if you struggle to find the energy to do that. I am glad that you have at least come here to talk about it, that is a good start.

Perhaps you need a change in your medication, I was on Klonopin for a while and I slowly weaned myself off of it because it's a sedative and it made me even "more" depressed. That is just me and I am not a doctor, but you might not be doing well on whatever medication you might be taking and you may need to discuss it with a pdoc.

As far as taking a shower is concerned, the majority of the battle is getting yourself in the shower, that is what I find for myself, and I always feel so much better after I "do" finally shower. Same thing with cleaning up, I do little things and that helps, I make sure I don't see all the stuff that I don't do and instead just do "something" each day. My goal is just to accomplish something and not push myself any harder. Sometimes I find that once I tackle one thing I am more motivated to do something else.

Sorry you are struggling so much, please make sure you ask for help.

(((((Hugs))))))