i am currently working with a man who has 2 brain tumours, and stomach cancer. he is really sensitive about it and doesnt like talking to people about it, which is understandable. but he and i had a really long talk today and i told him about my depression (because he is suffering it now) and i told him about why i was depressed. we really got to know eachother today, we just talked for hours. he told me he was abused at a young age and that he had cancer when he was 19 (my current age!!) and that he now has it. he was explaining how people usually abandon him once they find out what hes going through.

after hours of talking, i told him that i am here for him whenever he needs me, and i told him that, even though i am leaving my job (he knows im going) i will still be here for him if he needs me, and i gave him my number and said to him that he can ring me anytime if he needs me.

he said he has no friends outside of work (same as me) and he doesnt go out weekends and evenings (same as me) and when he told me about his abuse i told him i was sexually abused at the age of 10 too. so i went on to explain to him about my depression i was in and i reassured him i know how he feels, except for the cancer bit. but i know what hes going through mentally.

he was glad i gave him my number and he asked me if it was ok for him to ring me of he needs me, and i said "yes, of course, im here to help, anytime of any day, im just the other end of a phone" and he was grateful to have that support.

i am glad i can relate to what hes going through, i know what hes going through mentally and i am sure i can help. even if its a small help, its still help. i know what its like to be alone and have no one to talk to, so i made sure he knew he doesnt have to be alone.

i found it a relief to be able to tell someone about me and how i got to where i am today. i feel like he knows me now and i know him. and i am so grateful for that.
i also feel grateful that i am able to help and i am kind of glad i went through what i did these past years, because it has made me grateful for what i have and i appreciate life and happiness, plus it has given me the gift to help others, which is so important to me.

i dont know why i feel it is important, thinking about it, i think its because i know what its like, and i feel that i can use my knowledge to try to change someones life, even if it such a slight change.

i just thought i would share this and ask if others are in the same situation.

speak soon

simon