Oh hillbunnyb, this is "key" for me!!:
</font><blockquote><div id="quote"><font class="small">Quote:</font>
It's not that we mess up, it's how we clean up.

</div></font></blockquote><font class="post"> as a child I was punished, love was with held and I was not forgiven for mistakes-branded "bad" --- I even get much anxiety when in relationships, as I fear making mistakes that will never be forgiven.

You said it so well....... I'm going to keep repeating that--- "it's how we clean up"--- like apologies are good clean up and not repeating that mistake again(when possible) is another good clean up. If the other party doesn't/won't accept, at least I can hold on to that--- "it's how we clean up".

Thank you-- this is VERY timely for me!!--both in my 3-D life and my cyber-life.

hillbunnyb-- ... this is awesome!