just saw your post roadie. i am so sorry about your cats. maybe feline leuk.? at any rate our 4 legged animals are our best friends so that makes the loss even greater.
as for your health, has your doc run more tests are referred you to a specialist? that's very important. they need to get to the bottom of your symptoms. i think i understood correctly your dilemma.
pease know we are all here to help you get thru this difficult time. keep us updated.
i wish i was able to be there irl cause you've been such a good friend. 
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Do not let your fire go out, spark by irreplaceable spark, in the hopeless swamps of the approximate, the not-quite, the not-yet, the not-at-all. Do not let the hero in your soul perish, in lonely frustration for the life you deserved, but have never been able to reach. Check your road and the nature of your battle.
The world you desired can be won. It exists, it is real, it is possible, it is yours..~Ayn Rand
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