Sally...

"-The next few days, he told me things about his home life, that he had been impotent at home, that he thought it would be more beautiful with me, that his wife is beautiful but that I'm sexy
-I told him that I only wanted to be friends; he got on his knees and said that he would do his very best to build a secure bond for us, but that he was powerfully drawn to me; he said I'm the most beautiful woman he's ever known.
-He sent two emails later: one saying that he wasn't talking about a hierarchy of beauty and that if he was I would win, and the other saying that he knows he puts too much pressure on me, but that it's because he trusts me and loves me madly
-Going crazy with contradictions, I sent a cutting ties email"

You are right. He was full of contradictions. If he does not believe in a hierarchy of beauty (I agree with him on that), then why make a pairwise comparison between you and the wife?

Just to offer for you to consider... develop a policy on acceptable compliments. My policy is: "Superlative or regular adjectives but no comparatives".

With this policy of mine, I accept "sexy, beautiful etc." OR "the most... in my life etc." but never "you are ...ER than {person X}".

I think that pairwise comparisons are sort of debased and I do not want to stoop to that level.

Am I making sense?