I'm no doctor but what you describe feels like depression: the not wanting anything or care for anything special.
But then there's something you want and you know that precisely, so go for it!! You shouldn't have the life you don't want, but the one you want!!
So why not try and find people and places where you can live your dream of living off the earth?
I guess you can't do it right away, but building up dreams is one of the best things in our lives!!