I struggle with this issue in my head every day and constantly question my morals.

I will never forgive a cheater. I've been cheated on, and it disgusts me to think of sleeping with someone that's been with someone else while committed. Makes me sick t my stomach.

At the same time, I've finally found a man who is loyal, trustworthy, and faithful, who is here for the long run and wants to build a family. But there are also major qualities lacking - his maturity, knowledge, job ability and ambition, and also we aren't very sexually compatible and our lack of sex life has taken a major toll. I justify staying with him as, "you can't have your cake and eat it too..."

Well, I am impulsive and generally an emotional mess. Ive filled the voids in our relationship by having an affair with a older man. He accepts that I am in a relationship, probably because of his culture. The two relationships balance me and make me feel whole. When I try to end my affair, I always end up going back because the holes are left empty again. I was in therapy but lost my insurance, so right now I'm just between a rock and a hard place.

It is a double life and I am such a hypocrite. Don't know what else I can say except share my story...