sorry i took so long to replying, havent really been on here for long recently.

janniebug - you can have the "guts" to do it, its just a case of being a friend to somebody who needs it. i believe anyone can do it, and i dont think its anything special for me to do what im doing, its just who i am.

tanya - thank you. im just grateful to help really. those of us who survive dark times are able to use it to help others, even if its such a small help.

sky - im here if you need me. you dont have to be alone in this, i promise im here for you (and everyone else) if you should ever need me. you are doing great sky. i can see that.

bethsway - thank you. i am able to here for others because i have others who are here for me too. without that life would be so hard, it will be how it use to be. i see it as a circle, others help and support me, so i am able to help and support others, but with the other people still helping and supporting me. if you see what i mean.

and perna, i completely agree. it is a comfort to know others are there. i find that. i am so glad to be able to come to PC and know that there are people who know how you feel and want to help, and that in itself is a great help. so if i can help others too, then i will without a shadow of doubt. well done for doing that perna, im proud of you for being able to realise she needed someone and you were able to expose your own problems to be able to let somebody realise that you are there for them. you did good.

i have never considered myself as special, and i never will. i just act out how i feel, and i have known hes been in distress for a while, and ive wanted to help ut ive been advised that he is very sensitive about it and he gets upset if people just ask how he is. so i decided to tackle it head on, i thought that nobody deserves to be living that life alone. he only has one other friend he can turn to for support, and she is unwell herself at the moment (she has a cold/flu, the cold that i gave her, ooops ) and people who are living the life hes living dont deserve to be so unhappy and lonely, and even though i have never had cancer, i know how lonely it can be to be so unhappy. so to be able to offer support for him is the least i can do. its just the way i see life.

thats why i want to get into music too. i feel i want to help others through song, as many artists do. i love music and singing, and i am glad to be able to support those who need it, so to combine it and help those through song, well thats all that i want out of life. that will make me the happiest person ever. at the moment i am able to help others, whether its good or not i dont know, but i still try. and even though i am not yet helping people thorugh song, i know that is to follow.

im just grateful for the life i lead i suppose. even with its numerous problems and faults. its best to keep looking on the best side of life, even when it feels there isnt one. theres always a bigger picture...

simon