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Old Mar 22, 2013, 10:57 PM
BlessedRhiannon's Avatar
BlessedRhiannon BlessedRhiannon is offline
Magnate
 
Member Since: Feb 2011
Location: Texas
Posts: 2,396
I understand that you think you were doing the best thing by calling your partner's therapist to talk about issues you were concerned about. You feel you have lots of experience with therapy and medicine and wanted things to go smoothly for your partner, and wanted to make sure things were being addressed that you felt needed to be addressed.

Here's the thing, though. It's not YOUR therapy. It's your partner's. That means that they get to determine what is addressed in therapy, not you. It also means that the therapist holds confidentiality with your partner, not you. It was right for the therapist to tell your partner about the phone call. It would probably have been a more appropriate action for you to talk to your partner about your concerns, or ask for a joint session with the therapist, where you could bring these things up.

In regards to the issue of your previous partner seeing your therapist, and that not being disclosed...well, they were seeing the therapist for their own therapy. Not to talk about your therapy. The difference is that you were both clients and both working on your own things.

As far as questioning medical advice given to your partner by any medical practitioner, well, sure, you can bring that up WITH YOUR PARTNER. It's not really your place to contact the practitioner instead of talking to your partner, unless you are a caregiver or medical proxy for your partner. Most medical practitioners won't give out any patient information or discuss patient care with someone not part of the immediate family or listed as a medical proxy.

I think the key issue here is communication...you've chosen to go around your partner rather than communicating directly with them. In relationships, direct communication tends to work better.
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---Rhi
Thanks for this!
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