For me, a big part of it was figuring out, why did the family treat me the way they did. And then accepting that, instead of fighting it or trying to change it or even say why it was wrong. It's pretty obvious why it was wrong - I mean, who does that?? Hmm. Maybe it IS important to say why it was wrong. Just thinking out loud here. I see therapy as you writing the story of your own life - YOU explaining why things happened. You might have very different reasons than your family but you're entitled to them.