It's pretty much impossible to trigger me right now. I've totally shut down emotionally.

That one memory: all I actually remember is a story he told me that he made up.

I know he put me to bed at other times. I remember other stories that he told me, but not the experience of being told them. And because sometimes my mum wasn't there.-

Also. I told my T how I once put my toothbrush in my pocket and ran around to my next door neighbour's house - this lovely old lady called E - in my pajamas. I know I was crying, because E said: "The things people do to make children cry." When my dad came to get me he treated it like a joke and said: "Why didn't you say you wanted to go and visit E?" But I didn't tell my T that my mum was away at the time. I have no idea why I was crying.

Actually I remember something else about that bedtime story but I can't write it down. Roll on therapy, I guess.