Please give it another try. You may not feel like you want to, but if you didn't want to get better, and have some hope that you could, you wouldn't have asked for help. It often takes more than one try to find the right counselor, the right medication, the right treatment, but there is something out there that will work for you. It doesn't have to stay that bad. I was there, and I didn't think that things would ever get better either, but they did. I found a therapist who understood me, at least some of the time. I use St. John's Wort, and it doesn't make me numb. Sometimes it makes me a little bit manic, but I don't mind that.

I understand hurting yourself and feeling like you don't even deserve to eat. But that's the disease talking. It isn't the real you. You are a good person. You haven't done anything so bad as to deserve to be hated. People care about you, and I'm glad that you have told someone that you need help. Please accept that help and their caring, and keep trying. It will get better.

Wendy

<font color=orange>"If we are going to insist that people pull themselves up by their own bootstraps, we must ensure that they have boots."</font color=orange>