I realized this morning I have very little respect for myself. I feel like I have spent so much of my life trying to be so much like others I have done things that go against my own values just to have someone in my life. I have let others treat me badly out of fear of losing them. I guess that all goes back to lack of self esteem and maybe some feeling of self shame because I my lack of ability to control my emotions. I also realized I have let others take my identity away from me. I think deep down inside I know who I am but fear being judged so much that I have hidden me away. I have spent my life following others like a scared little puppy and now I am somewhere and someone I don't want to be. All alone...