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The amount of shame I received from my abuser's act may have caused my child-mind to decide that I was so worthless that I had no right to exist; no right to be alive. Shame is a powerful feeling. When it was inflicted on me as a child by an adult's shameless act, I had no defenses to keep it out of my developing self.
Many of us may have thought about suicide many times before: during and even after recovery has begun. I believe that the suicide gesture is about challenging our inherent right to live. Our abusers mentally stripped us of this right, and we need to seek and accept all the support we can while we encounter this message.
Today I affirm my right to be alive. I affirm my right to enjoy the beauty the world gives me. And most of all, I affirm my right to cherish myself as a valuable and precious being - worthy of life.
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