I understand how you feel. I was a very very (VERY) ugly kid from grade school through middle school. And a less ugly, but still ugly girl from high school through early college years. And so I too have become obsessed with looks. I changed my hair color and instantly I became pretty...it was kind of odd really that one simple change was all it took. So, basically I'm obsessed with my hair.

Also with losing weight—I apparently haven't lost enough weight yet to make a difference in how people perceive me (at least not at the same level as my hair).

I've also felt like I've had to "feminize" myself. I've always been boyish...I generally prefer men's clothes except they're way too big usually now that I'm skinnier. But I feel more compelled to wear makeup and somewhat more effeminate clothes. I don't like people being able to look at me and immediately knowing what my sexual orientation is (or rather is not).

I don't know how else to get out of it except changing the way you look...which I'll probably get blasted for saying. I'm not going to say that that will instantly give you tons of self-esteem (as I still have low self-esteem in regards to my looks), but at least I don't think I'm the ugliest person around anymore. And all I did was change my hair color, put on a little makeup, and compromised my clothing style between what I like and what is more "appropriate" for lack of a better word.