I finally sent my brother the email. Now I'm freaking out. I'm all shaky and uncomfortable and anxious and uuuuughhh...

Here's the email I sent

I have been having a hard time dealing with things from the past. When you came back into town it caused an emotional breakdown. I spent years trying to ignore what happened when we were kids, trying to convince myself that it was just a dream so when you came back I nearly had a nervous breakdown. It was bad.

I think mentally it would be best for me if I could have some distance. And unfortunately that would include the wedding. I can't have reminders of the past I'm trying to overcome on the day I'm starting my future.

I'm sure you know what I'm talking about and I don't want to cause a riff in the family so I'd prefer you make up an excuse for not attending the wedding so we don't have to go into details with everyone or anyone.

If you haven't gone to therapy for this since high school I'd suggest going to therapy. It really helps put everything into perspective


I'm bugging out now.