My bipolar 2 was diagnosed 3 months ago. I spent 25 to 37 in a state of manic depression not knowing it, and taking ssri's that made it worse. I slowly ruined a carrier that I built in my 30's behavior coupled with my drinking. Out of love, people would have kept me around, but DUI's took me out. My family and my wifes family were simply fed up with me, and didn't know what was wrong, WE all blamed it on alcoholism. In Rehab they put me on 250 mg of Seroquil for sleep and to augment my topomax all for OCD, nobody knew my underlying disorder was being treated. Now diagnosed and on Lithium things are so stable and I can see so clearly how out of control I was. I wonder why anybody is still friends with me really, those I kept and did not loose. I want to be angry that I was not diagnosed sooner, and that my life could have been saved sooner, that I could have been there for my daughters and wife, but its a hole. I'm 40, I lost my 30's, and I'm trying to come to grips with it. My family wants to stay the course that it was alcoholism that took me out, don't know why, maybe its easy for them and they think AA will make me a "good" person. I'm just sad that so much time was spent in my life crazy really, not calm, and I lost so much.