I used to think of myself as a reverse Midas - everything I touched turned to sh it. I think what helped was allowing myself to experience myself in a different way in T. My T has been adamant that she did not see me in the same way I saw myself. I trusted her, little by little, which meant needing to change my self-perception too. Not that everything is sunshine and roses now, but it's a whole lot better.

Conjure up a thought of the most extremely positive thing you can. (I'm picturing a world in which no one gets hurt, my actions are all carried out with good will, etc.). It's kinda hard to believe, right? I think the same is true for extreme negativity. There's just no way, statistically, for that to be possible. I'm willing to bet my first and second born that you don't ruin and destroy everything.