I've struggled with feeling detached from my children from time to time, not recognizing them or not recognizing myself as their mother. They are grown now and left home but I still struggle with this. some times for shorter periods than others. Once I learned about my DID, we made an agreement with the T that some jobs are for the host and some are for insiders. If we'd known about this when my children were small we probably would have said it was the hosts job to feed and bathe them, get them to bed. But for playing it would have been our younger insiders or when teens, would have had our teens spend some time with them. Its all about learning to work together.

Another thing my T brought to my attention was that some insiders hadn't met everyone that the host knew. That means the one who sees the new outside person is going to feel confused and feeling like they're missing some information. It can be very frustrating for them. so now if it becomes an issue, i'll tell the insider/s who so and so is and how they're connected to me. this helps them to relax and feel more comfortable around the new people. I don't tell the outside people, just the insiders quietly in my mind unless we're talking when we're alone.