My sister and I have both been trying to think of such things. She says "no" to suggestions. A while back, I had offered to take her on a road trip to the town she used to live in as a child, and this had seemed to interest her, but now, not so much. And she doesn't want to go visit another family member a few hours away. I suggested she put together some photos and mementos in an album, so that these are not lost, and so that we (her family) understood her past and life more, her history, etc. I offered to help, so we could do it together, if it is too hard for her--she has some cognitive impairment, memory loss, etc. It could be a social activity for us, and at the same time give her some purpose in leaving her history behind for her family so it is not lost. But she didn't exactly light up at this idea.

She lives in her own apartment in a residential center for seniors. There are many activities. She's been there about 9 months. She has made one friend there. She's just been sleeping a lot lately, not wanting to do much. She does an exercise class a few times a week and goes out walking by herself. I do think if she were involved in helping others, that would be good, but I'm not sure what it would be. It would have to be something she could do with her current mental skills, and something that she could get to on her own. The center provides transportation to residents' doctors' appointments, but not to social events, volunteering, church, etc., unless it is organized by the center, and I have not heard of them having organized volunteering.

I'm looking for what that reason to live might be... Not sure how to go about the "get her active" idea. How do I do that? There are so many activities to choose from at the center. If she isn't choosing them, then what? She seems worse since losing the use of her car a few months ago. Now she can't drive herself anywhere, so she is "stuck" at the center. A loss of freedom. For so long, before moving to the center, she took care of my Dad, but once he died, that role of caretaker ended, and a year later she moved to the center. She isn't needed by anyone in the same way now. I thought maybe the album idea would make her feel needed, but that bombed.

Everyone has had good suggestions, and I'm not meaning to be rejecting of them, although it must look that way. I just feel she's worse than before, more down, and not doing the activities she used to and not wanting to do anything or go anywhere. I'm not sure how to help. She said today she's worried she might live another 10 years.