I can relate to having a narcissistic father during my growing up years, but I left the family to get away from all that when I was an young adult. so didn't have anything to do with him for about 15 years. He passed away without connecting again.

add on:

I wanted to say more ealier but didn't have time.
It is incredibly difficult to live with someone who has NPD especially when they enjoy causing physical/emotional pain, then turn around and accuse you of asking for it, that you liked it. Tell you, you shouldn't get mad/cry or they'll give you something to be mad about or cry about. you can not reason with a person who is like this and it is pointless to try - hence their belief that they are always right. I spent years trying to convince my dad this was not the way to be all to no avail. he would nod and smile and hurt me again.

My dad was NPD. He said he hurt us because he loved us. That he had the right to hurt anyone in his own house. he'd pull us in and then watch us squirm and feel awkward. And he enjoyed it. was the time of his life to tickle me to oblivion, till I'd pass out. It was incredibly painful sometimes for days. My oldest brother was equally cruel. My other brothers I think have less NPD but I think it is more a confused personality or something - I think they're not sure what is the right way to be, sometimes they act tough and cold and other times they are compassionate and caring. maybe a kind of split between NPD and whatever normal is? There was a lot of abuse growing up - all kinds - and the further away from them I am, the better my life is. I too have wondered sometimes if I was NPD but then realizing the pain, thinking I'm not. But was certainly confused about how to be. I'm thankful for the people around me who are good examples of gentle caring people.

I realize that I can't convince someone like that that they're wrong or need to change, but I refuse to live with them, that is a heartache I can live without.