This is so complicated for me. There is so much going on around this issue. Obviously, I have a lot to work on here.

First, she doesn't deserve it, so if she gets compassion anyway, it will reinforce her stupidity in bringing all this on herself, and will make things worse next time (and I KNOW that this is all in the past, so it doesn't apply, but that is the thought that is going on around this issue).

Second, she's already a drama queen (and I am ambivalent writing that. I am not sure she is, but the parents said she was so, so so SO often that it's difficult to discount that information). She does not need any more attention. She cries and she's weak and compassion would just enjoy that weakness.

Compassion being offered was always a trick, somehow. A set up. She doesn't need it. She shouldn't trust it. She shouldn't want it.

AND she doesn't really exist. It's just one of those weird, stupid, crazy things my brain did in splitting her off, and I hate that this is even an issue for me. That makes me mad also.