I really try so hard not to do this, but I just get desperate and take a handful of drugs in an effort to feel no pain, physical and emotional. Yesterday was one of those days. I swallowed lots of extra Rx meds and OTC's to treat back pain. And then more to sleep. I know it's a slippery slope, but the need to feel better overwhelms me. I realized I had gone too far when our church Deacon asked me how his homily was and I had absolutely no idea what he had said although I had just sat and listened attentively to him. It's like a demon inside me that I don't control pushes me over what in my mind, intellectually, I know is not good for me. hugs to all. I love being here with people who understand.