I wish I could say the right thing but you are not any of the things you say you are in that post. You sound scared and upset, but that's only natural. Your therapist has managed to trigger some really deep emotions and memories and now you are having to live with the consequence. There is a high chance though that she does not think what you think she does. I have been in a similar place and I managed to email my therapist explaining I couldn't work with someone who felt like that about me and she managed to convince me that it wasn't true. I am glad now I stuck with it as she has been brilliant, but I had several periods like you describe. You can do this. You give so much good advice to others, but its hard to be positive to yourself, but you do deserve it.
You're now giving yourself the added worry of your H. That's really rough. Try to hear when people say they care. You are worth it, and this too will pass. But let people help you, you deserve it as much as anyone else.