I think the title says it all. I HATE SEX AND IT IS NOT FAIR TO MY HUSBAND. I was raped 20 + years ago, before I met my Husband. I would be fine if we never had sex, It does nothing for me. I don't like to be touched in a sexual way or in a nonsexual way either. My poor H. This is not what he signed up for when we got married. Few men sign up for a life of no sex. That is kinda why you get married. So you can have sex w/ the same person forever.

My H is attractive, smart, funny, can be kind, and lets me stay home w/ the kids because that is important. I don't have to work, but could if I wanted to. My H is prepared in the bedroom. He knows what to do and what works and takes directions well. I just don't want to do it. I dissociate lots of the time. The amount of pressure I feel to make "IT" happen is quite stressful. Because if the big "O" don't happen then he feels a since of failure.

It is hard to believe in 18 years,(the amount of time we've been married) that I still have no desire to have sex. Not w/ him or anyone else. We have done things to spice it up a little but still nothing. We have watched pron together, it is like viewing a soap opera but they forgot there clothes. It doesn't do much for me either. We have tried wining and dining, there isn't much we haven't tried. I just have no interest. I have "O"'s from time to time and that is not the issues. It's not like they don't or can't happen. It's just I don't really care if they do or not. My H can get his fix, I don't care if I get mine or not. I'd be happier if he's just leave me alone.

Is this totally weird. Any idea on how to reclaim a happy healthy sex life. Or is my poor husband doomed to a married life w/ no sex.