For some reason, everytime I try to express what I am going through or feeling to someone or on a forum(like this) something shuts off the connection to my memory. I start forgetting how to type, what I was going to say, I become drained of energy, etc).

I dont understand what or why this is, but it makes it extremely difficult to communicate anything. Something is forcing my mind to shut down to deter me from doing something.

Also, there is always a battle/argument going on with someone else in my mind. Every time I try positive thinking, its immediately shot down by a negative voice who then takes control of my mind. At the same time, when I think negative, a female voice always tries to counter-act the statement, which turns into an argument about semantics and intellectualism.

I feel split, but not that there are two distinct identities that come out in real life. But my brain is completely undecided and lost all the time. 'It' doesnt know what it wants, and sometimes blocks me from doing certain things.

If this is another me manifesting, I think I will call it Command & Control, because it certainly feels that way.

Other people experience this phenomena?