I know what you mean about feeling really down. I'm sorry your wife left you, but it is hard to deal with a bipolar spouse, if you can put yourself in her shoes a bit. My husband is also a Bipolar I.

Are you getting help, such as seeing a therapist and a psychiatrist? If you are on meds, then you need to call the doc and report how down you are. It sounds like some adjustments might need to be made.

I, too, have said I am determined not to give in to thoughts of doing myself in because of my family. It is devastating to them when a dad or mom gives in, and I don't want them to go through that. You are right to hang tough because of your three daughters. (I have Bipolar II and am also on disability.)