It may be the depression or other events in my life but I generally don't like myself. I often feel guilty and like I should be punished. Maybe it is the depression, or could be something else. I also have a history of self harm. When I am not feeling depressed I find it easier to like myself and be kind to myself. When I feel depressed I feel worthless and I often feel like I should punish myself for feeling bad.

My rational thinking tells me that is not the case and I don't deserve to be punished for having depression. It feels like I am disconnected sometimes. I have intense emotions that seams out of line with what a person should feel. I may also have borderline personality disorder, so maybe some of the self loathing is from that.

One of the criteria for depression is feeling of worthlessness or inapporiate feelings of guilt. This is usually without reason.