Aww I love you guys.
No news, not good news in this case. My sister has been in hospital a few times in the last few weeks, more tests..no answers. You guys probably remember that my sisters mother in law passed away from hep c before christmas. They are now testing my sister for that as well she lived with them for many years and so I guess that is a possibility. She looks extremely tired and worn thin, but trying to keep a posiitive attitide.

Other than that which addmitidly I am not handling well, yes my plate is overfull. I have a mid foot and high ankle sprain. A normal sprain can heal quicker a high ankle sprain not so much. My tibula and fibula have gapped apart. I was told no yoga for a few months, so no training in april either. Also have to find a new lex taxing yoga when I return as I have basically terrible knees, they are trying to manipulate them back to a normal position... trust me that feels quite gross, not painful just shudder.... So trying to find ways to cope with the stress without my number one tool. And learning how to take it easy as I am supposed to be off my feet. I hate that. They got it held together pretty good so walking feels crappy anyways. But yes I have still been working. But I cannot not do anything.

In other news my oldest son got himself into a heap of trouble which could have been a lot more serious. He has never been in trouble up to this point and I guess it is expected that teens will make some not so great decisions. So I have been trying to work with him on making goals, building better self esteem and confidence. He chose and started Tae Kwon Do. He came home with his first out of class assingments from there yesterday, assigment is on confidence. And the other part is on home, school, family, and self respect and responsability. He actually seems very excited about this and concerned about the direction he was starting to head down. I hope that he does have to learn the very hard way. I really hope this will have a positive impact for him.

Work has been very busy but we will be going into off season next week and it will slow down. I had to call in sick today. I am feeling really ill and just run down, Could barely get out of bed and head is pounding, just feel weak. .. We have had dentist, physio, kids activities, sister, easter, bf off work for workers comp injury..we had physio together haha. ( he returned today), dr.app't, birthdays etc all in the last two weeks. This weekend is bf's close cousins wedding, so that is about an 8 hour drive there .. this weekend. And then next is taking kids other direction 8 hours to an event we bought them tickets to before all the seams came apart.

I have one good peice of news. You guys know that I have been considering breast augmentation for a long time. I have worked on my self esteem a lot but that one peice of feeling unwomanly and misshaped has been a sore spot. I had made an appointment a few months back for a consult. That was yesterday. I feel very certain now and we scheduled the date. I choose the right shape and fit, proportionate for someone my size and age, quite natural looking . The 3d imaging they use was really neat and so helpful, yet strange and awkward. And I actually felt happy and excited. And nervous yes. But much less so. As with that quitting smoking is in the agenda...me ...quit...I am going to give my 100% best effort. With my sister it is just the right choice that I cannot ignore.

So that is what is going on for now. I have really been trying to decide what I want and where to go from here. My job is much to physically demanding for my health. And I feel no sense of meaning there. I have opportunity to make a decision. I can save money for training or whatever may be. I am not financially locked down with any debt as with no debt I have no credit as well. But thats ok, but thinking about the future I need a plan. The hard part is knowing what to do and believing I can.

Hehe sorry you asked? Kind of an ear full, sorry guys. I love you guys so much and miss you too. I see I have some pms to reply to and will. I hope you are all hanging in there as well. I'll try to catch up on the threads a bit.

Thank you for this dear DH! and keeping me in your thoughts you guys. Been thinking of yous too.