Thanks. I like the practical response. Yes...we already have plans with another couple to watch the game...and know he has the right to make his own choices about who he wants to spend time with.

My conflict is that this is the first time anyone close to me ever stated that "you are welcome...but not you and your wife". I can;t image doing this to anyone I care about...i would just accept it, deal with it...and probably complain later, but I would respect my friend. Is this wrong?

On the other hand...this situation highlights for me the internal conflict that I have about my marriage. I had doubts all along...but always told myself things would get better soon...if we just went to counseling...if I just learn to listen better...if I...if I....

Reading this...it sounds like I am whining...but this is a conflict for me: I am 41, have been in several long-term relationships, and have no family close by. I like our home and dogs, I like my step-children....but I struggle, selfishly or not, with my marriage.

The more I think of it the REAL issue at hand is....I have been ambivalent about my marriage due to how I am treated vs. my commitment vs. my feeling that I am married to the wrong person. My friend , who has listened to me vent for countless hours, is finally making a public stand that he does not like her and I am forced to deal with the consequence.

The real issue is about my own conflicts about my marriage....